Kids

It always seems like that every time i get with a girl, somthing brings up the subject of children. Im starting to realise more and more how much I dont want kids, ever. Im just wondering if they're really all they're cracked up to be.

I had a talk with my mom the other night, and she said she despised children, and the only reason she had a baby was to compete with her sister in law. But as soon as she had my younger sister, she loved her.

Sometimes I feel there is an unspoken taboo in our society where if you admit that having kids wasn't quite what you thought it would be and that if you could do it all over again that you would have chosen NOT to have kids, that you are a monster, an evil, despicable monster.

Maybe ill change my mind in a few years, im not sure quite yet.

haha, I'm the same way. I know how I was as a kid (quite the nutcase/uncontrollable child). My parents couldn't ever find babysitters for my siblings and me; why the hell would I want to be in that situation as a parent?

Kids are cool, don't get me wrong, but I appreciate being able to give them back after a few minutes. I don't think the hospital would look too kindly upon me if I showed up a day after giving birth and asked them to take it back...

Whenever I talk to other girls in my dorm about it, though, they look at me like I'm completely nuts. Why do you HAVE to want kids? Is there this mentality in other parts of the world?

I know so many adults that are looked down upon because they choose not to have children. They're labeled selfish or whatnot. How bad is that? With the packed health system in Australia and numerous other problems in the world, why can't people work themselves out first, then think about having kiddies? Having said that, I would love to have some kids one day when I find the right guy. Maybe when I'm in my late 20's and finished Uni and worked for a bit. Like PP said, at this age I'm glad to be able to hand kids back. I don't know how girls my age can handle having kids. I don't think I would be able to.

The world is overpopulated. Although I'm not sure if I want kids or not yet, I feel obligated to have them merely because of the growing amounts of "cess" in the gene pool. I say don't have kids if you don't really want, and if you do have kids, beat them.

Even when I WAS a kid I couldn't stand them. I'll be getting a vesectomy as soon as I can...

Like when you turn 18 and say to your parents: "kiss my hairy white British ass", after they ask you to give them lots of grandchildren?

I simply want to have kids so my last name can go another generation, and hope to have a boy so that it may go on another generation. And then see him have a boy so that it may hit another generation. My last name is too special to to let it fizzle out now. You guys think that's a selfish goal?

na, its the furthering of your family name.

I used to think that I didn't want kids, but the more I htink about it, I probably will have kids, whether its by accident or what. I'm the last remaining carrier of my name so....yeah. And I think itd be kinda cool to have a little me running around. Oh lord, another me?!?!

Now that you mention that, I guess I gotta have kids. There's only one other carrier of the family name besides me, and he's not the type you want perpetuating the family name...

Well, I guess it really isn't selfish of me then. Woohoo!

Screw that. I won't get to continue on my family name anyway.

You guys have all the kids you want; as for us ladies...

...give us your details and we will get back to you! Just kidding.

I never really thought about making sure my family name gets continued on. I feel so sorry for my brother now. He is the only male in my family that can carry the surname on. (My Dad has a brother and a sister, and his brother only had girls). So we got high hopes for him.

My dad is the second younest of 5, and all my uncles had boys. Dont really have to worry about my last name continuing. However im the third as far as first names go, hmm.

i'm all for carrying on the family name, but sometimes it can be a little unfair. my only siblings are sisters, and all my other cousins are girls, except for one. he gets treated a lot better than the rest of us (gets more christmas presents :( ), especially w/ my grandpa- baby boomers are obsessed w/ continuing the family legacy or whatever.

Kids drive me nuts. I dispise em, they're so annoying. I will only date a woman (if ever) who equally doesnt like em, because I dont want little annoying versions of me running around. Thats a scary thought. :eek:

little annoying versions of me running around. Thats a scary thought.
Exactly why I'd have kids.

It occured to me yesterday while going over human development in my psychology class, that it would be so much fun to have a child and watch it learn and grow every day. Watch it become one with the world, seeing things for the first time. It would truly be a thing to experience.

i agree NMN. it would be so cool to see how someone's life turns out, the choices they make from the beginning of their life, to see the person they eventually become.

I gotta say I want mini me's running around, not for the family name crap, my original family name died with my father and my other family name has already got the next generation sorted through my nephew so we have no issues there, plus I'll be a traditionalist and take on whatever name I marry into.
Mybe its just the maternal instinct thing, but it's not happening for a looooong time.

Yup, I'll definatley be doing the same and taking my husbands name when I marry. I'll be glad to have a surname that I don't have to spell out everytime I go to the doctors/bank/school ect.

Sometimes I feel there is an unspoken taboo in our society where if you admit that having kids wasn't quite what you thought it would be and that if you could do it all over again that you would have chosen NOT to have kids, that you are a monster, an evil, despicable monster.

Maybe ill change my mind in a few years, im not sure quite yet.
Just a thought - maybe that's a societal instinct - if society didn't "force" you to have kids then society wouldn't continue on.

I don't know if I can speak for the whole Israeli society since I live in a pretty segragated section of it, but I know that in the religious community not having children is virtually unthinkable, probably because sex for any other purpose is not accepted and everybody has sex.

Personally, I'm really looking forward to being a father, and not just for the religious reason or to "continue the family name" (which my parents already changed to a more Hebrew sounding one when they got to Israel), but for the idea of fatherhood itself. I can't imagine anything better than raising a person and sending him off to have a good life, which on the other hand is terrifying since you could fail, but that at least is not something I'm planning on chickening out of.
This is true for basically everything, but I'm wondering if people shouldn't be made to somehow prove themselves competent before being allowed to be parents. It's scary - defenseless human beings could be born to whoever the hell wants. There should at least be some organised governmental instruction, and I don't mean the health kind, but more the psychological kind, about how to prepare your child for life, but then that'd probably be impossible to do until there are some agreed-upon universal truths on the subject, which is to say never, so, for a change I have no idea what I think.

well i can sorta help with the thoughts here guys. im a mother, yep i have 3 girls....no boys but oh well. i had them young, found out exactly what guys were all about but anyway. dont get me wrong i love my kids, it is an experience watching them grow, seeing the magic the world has in thier eyes. and honestly they can make u laugh at times with thier antics and words. but like i said i had them young. looking back on it now, i wish my timing had of been better. i never had the traditional teen years, i was fulfilling my responsibility of being a mother. i dont have a career or much freedom ie like going out every weekend. i wish in one respect that i still had that time. but on the ohter hand, im damn proud of my kids etc, and im glad ive had them young. when everyone is settling down in thier older ages for kids, i can have my time, and know im wiser and more responsible to enjoy the world for what it has to offer. i wouldnt change a thing, yeah sure its shit when finding relationships, but thats when u find out the serious ones from the 'wanna get laid' ones. they test ur patience yeah sure, hell u have days when they anger u. but honestly, they help u grow in different ways too. i wouldnt change a thing. they are my pride and joy.

Yup, I'll definatley be doing the same and taking my husbands name when I marry. I'll be glad to have a surname that I don't have to spell out everytime I go to the doctors/bank/school ect.
Your surnames not that hard to spell out...or maybe I just feel that way cause I've seen it writen down, eh, either way. Just make sure you meet a guy with a nice easy surname to spell out, no Panayiotopoulos's OK.

Your surnames not that hard to spell out...or maybe I just feel that way cause I've seen it writen down, eh, either way. Just make sure you meet a guy with a nice easy surname to spell out, no Panayiotopoulos's OK.

Don't tell me thats a surname of someone you know! The hardest friends name I probably know is Szyantyr. It's said "Shunta", and I said it "Zanter" for about two years. Nah, my last name looks easy when its written down, its the pronounciation that gets people. Damn vowels.

I'll be glad to have a surname that I don't have to spell out everytime I go to the doctors/bank/school ect.

HAHAHA good luck, youll end up marrying someone called "einzenbeergen"
or "tahatmaroo"

thats the way it goes, and eons gonna marry someone called "mema" or "mame"
or something that makes her first name sound even funnier than it is...

it could be worse and be a hypenated name....thats interesting when giving a signature.

...eons gonna marry someone called "mema" or "mame"
or something that makes her first name sound even funnier than it is...
Ha ha ha ha, thats like a chick I know called Amanda, and she's going out with a guy called Nick Mander. If they get married, she'll be Amanda Mander!

Wow, we're so off topic...what were we talking about? Kids, thats it.